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Keeping friends · Lesson 10 of 10

Your Friendship Plan: A Simple Checklist for Adults

Learn when loneliness needs more than new friends, where to get help, and fill in a simple seven-step friendship plan.

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THE WRITTEN LESSONFollow along at your pace

This is the last lesson. First you will see when loneliness needs more than new friends, and where to get help. Then you will put everything from this course into one simple friendship plan. This is general information, not medical advice.

When to get help

Loneliness that eases as you settle in is normal. But if you feel low most of the day, nearly every day, for more than two weeks, talk to a doctor. The same goes if loneliness has lasted for months and is wearing you down. Long, heavy loneliness can raise the risk of anxiety disorderanxiety disorder: A mental health condition in which worry or fear is persistent, out of proportion to the situation and hard to control, and gets in the way of daily life. It differs from ordinary anxiety, which passes, and it is diagnosed by a clinician.Full entry in the glossary and depressiondepression: A common mental health condition in which low mood or loss of interest lasts most of the day, nearly every day, for weeks, along with changes such as poor sleep, tiredness or trouble concentrating. It is diagnosed by a clinician, and effective treatments exist.Full entry in the glossary, and help works.

A note says Easing as you settle in is normal. A calendar with 2+ weeks sits beside a sad face labelled Low most days, and a person talks to a doctor under the words Talk to a doctor. A chip reads Months, wearing you down, and green text says Help works.(opens the full-size picture)
Two weeks of low mood, or months of heavy loneliness, are reasons to see a doctor.

In a crisis

If you ever feel unsafe, or think about harming yourself, do not wait. Call your local emergency number, or a crisis line in your country. Telling one person you trust also helps.

A warning note says If you feel unsafe, don't wait. Below it, a phone with a keypad is labelled Your local emergency number, a phone with a globe is labelled Crisis line, and two people with a heart are labelled Tell one person you trust.(opens the full-size picture)
Your local emergency number first, then a crisis line, and one person you trust.

Get help now

If you are in danger or may harm yourself, call your local emergency number right away. If you can, tell someone near you.

Apps cannot replace people

A chatbotchatbot: A program that holds a conversation in everyday language, replying to what a user types or says. Most of today's AI chatbots run on large language models, which can give fluent, confident answers that are partly or wholly wrong.Full entry in the glossary or an app can help you practise what to say, or get you through a hard evening. But ask yourself one question: if the app vanished tomorrow, who would you talk to? If there is no answer, that is the gap this plan is for.

A laptop with chat bubbles is labelled Useful for practice. A thought bubble asks If the app vanished, who would I talk to, and below it a green box shows two smiling people at a café table. A yellow label reads The gap this plan is for.(opens the full-size picture)
If the app vanished tomorrow, who would you talk to?

Your friendship plan, part one

Here are the first four steps. Each one comes from an earlier lesson. One: join one regular group you would enjoy anyway, and give it a few months. Two: use an opener, and ask follow-up questions. Three: after a chat, check the evidence, not your worry. Four: make one specific invitation each week.

A numbered plan. One, with a weekly calendar: Join one regular group. Two, with a speech bubble: Open, then follow up. Three, with a magnifying glass: Check the evidence. Four, with an invitation card: One invitation a week.(opens the full-size picture)
Steps one to four: a group, an opener, a check on your worries, an invitation.

Your friendship plan, part two

Five: share a little more, in turns, with the phone away. Six: send one warm message to an old friend, and suggest a call. Seven: set a repeating date with two friends. And remember the hours: friendship grows with time, so keep showing up. You do not need to do all seven at once. Start with one step this week, and add the next when the first feels natural.

The plan continues. Five, with a ladder: Share a little more. Six, with a phone: Message an old friend. Seven, with a Friday calendar and a loop arrow: Set a repeating date. On the right, a clock and a growing plant carry the words Keep showing up.(opens the full-size picture)
Steps five to seven, and the reminder to keep showing up.

YOUR TURN

My friendship plan

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Read the full lesson script

Welcome to the last lesson. First, you'll see when loneliness needs more than new friends, and where to get help. Then you'll put everything from this course into one simple friendship plan.

Loneliness that eases as you settle in is normal. But if you feel low most of the day, nearly every day, for more than two weeks, talk to a doctor. The same goes if loneliness has lasted for months and is wearing you down. Long, heavy loneliness can raise the risk of anxiety and depression, and help works.

If you ever feel unsafe, or think about harming yourself, don't wait. Call your local emergency number, or a crisis line in your country. Telling one person you trust also helps.

Chatbots and apps can help you practise what to say, or get through a hard evening. But ask yourself one question: if the app vanished tomorrow, who would you talk to? If there's no answer, that's the gap this plan is for.

Here's your plan. One: join one regular group you'd enjoy anyway, and give it a few months. Two: use an opener, and ask follow-up questions. Three: after a chat, check the evidence, not your worry. Four: make one specific invitation each week.

Five: share a little more, in turns, with the phone away. Six: send one warm message to an old friend, and suggest a call. Seven: set a repeating date with two friends. And remember the hours: friendship grows with time, so keep showing up.

So remember: if low mood lasts more than two weeks, talk to a doctor, and in a crisis call your local emergency number. Apps can help, but people matter most. And your plan is simple: show up regularly, invite, go deeper, and keep in touch. For your last task, fill in your friendship plan, and start with one step this week. Thank you for taking this course.