WiserHours
Menu

Follow your curiosity

Get ready · Lesson 1 of 10

Why Most People Don't Negotiate Their Salary

See why many people accept the first pay offer, what holds them back, and how a polite, reasoned ask keeps goodwill.

FREE LESSON
Cover picture for lesson 1: Why Most People Don't Negotiate Their SalaryVideo coming soon
The video is not out yet. The written lesson below has the same content.
THE WRITTEN LESSONFollow along at your pace

Many people take the first number they are offered and never ask for more. This lesson shows why that happens, what really goes wrong when people do ask, and how the rest of this course will help you ask with confidence.

The first number is a starting point

When an offer arrives, many people say yes on the spot. Asking for more feels rude or risky. But an offer is rarely truly final. It is usually the start of a conversation.

A small difference now can also follow you for years. Raises are often a percentage of what you already earn, so a gap at the start tends to grow. In the picture, two people start $2,000 apart (invented numbers, to show the idea). One asked and one said yes at once, and the gap widens every year.

A job offer for $50,000 per year with a stamp reading Yes!, and a speech bubble Is there flexibility? On the right, a bar chart over five years compares someone who asked for $2,000 more (green) with someone who said yes at once (grey), with the gap growing each year.(opens the full-size picture)
Raises are a percentage of pay, so an early gap grows.

Nerves lower the number

Nerves play a big part. In a set of experiments, people who felt anxious expected less, opened with lower numbers, gave up sooner and ended up with less money. The worry did not change what they hoped for. It changed what they expected to get.

These were short lab tasks, and most of the people in them were students, so treat the finding as a pattern worth knowing, not a rule. The useful part is this: if nerves lower your number, then preparing early, before you feel the pressure, is the best protection.

A worried face next to a card showing the number a person writes down, $60,000 crossed out and replaced by $52,000. Chips read Expected less, Gave up sooner, Got less and Short lab tasks, students. Below, Hope: same and Expect: lower.(opens the full-size picture)
The hope stays the same. The expectation drops.

Clear rules help

Not knowing the rules holds people back too. In one large experiment with job seekers, men tried to negotiate their pay more often than women. But when the job ad said the pay was negotiable, the gap disappeared.

So one simple question helps everyone: “How is pay decided here?” It tells you whether asking is expected, and it is a calm, friendly way to start.

Two Office assistant job ads. Under the first, a tall bar for Men asked and a shorter bar for Women asked. The second ad has a Pay is negotiable label and two equal bars. A speech bubble reads How is pay decided here?(opens the full-size picture)
When the ad says pay is negotiable, the gap closes.

What actually goes wrong

In research on first offers, very bold openings led to more deadlocks, which means talks that get stuck with no deal, and to more bad feeling. Anger did most of the damage. A figure you can back with a reason, asked politely, is the safer way.

Two cards. The left, crossed out in red, reads A huge number, no reason, with an angry face, a broken handshake and the words More deadlocks. The right, ticked, reads A figure plus one reason, asked politely, with a smiling face, a whole handshake and The safer way.(opens the full-size picture)
Same ask, two ways. Only one keeps the goodwill.

The method for this course

The course gives you a simple method with three steps. First, do your homework on what the work is worth. Second, decide your target and the point where you would say no. Third, use short, polite sentences that you have practised.

Pay rules differ between countries. Where the law matters, the course will tell you to check your local rules, because it cannot give legal advice.

Three numbered steps: Do your homework, shown by a magnifier over job ads; Target and walk-away, shown by a range bar with a green target flag and a red walk-away line; and Short, practised sentences, shown by a speech bubble. A chip reads Check your local rules.(opens the full-size picture)
Three steps: research, two numbers, practised words.

The course ahead

There are ten short lessons. You will find your market value, set your target and walk-away point, and learn what to say when money comes up in hiring. Then you will reply to a job offer, negotiate the whole package and practise simple scripts. Last, you will ask for a raise, handle a no, get it in writing and make your plan.

A row of ten numbered icons under the heading Ten short lessons, one step at a time: Market value, Target and walk-away, Money in hiring, Reply to an offer, The whole package, Simple scripts, Ask for a raise, Handle a no, Get it in writing and Your plan.(opens the full-size picture)
Ten lessons, one step at a time.

YOUR TURN

Read more

Read the full lesson script

Welcome to How to Negotiate Your Salary and Ask for a Raise. In this first lesson, you'll see why so many people take the first number they're offered, what holds them back, and how this short course will help you ask with confidence.

Picture a job offer arriving. Many people say yes on the spot, because asking for more feels rude or risky. But an offer is rarely truly final. It's usually the start of a conversation. And a small difference now can follow you for years, because future raises are often a percentage of what you earn.

Nerves play a big part. In a set of experiments, people who felt anxious expected less, opened with lower numbers, gave up sooner, and ended up with less money. The worry didn't change what they hoped for. It changed what they expected to get. These were short lab tasks with students, but the pattern is worth knowing.

Not knowing the rules holds people back too. In one large experiment with job seekers, men tried to negotiate their pay more often than women. But when the job ad said the pay was negotiable, the gap disappeared. So one simple question helps everyone: how is pay decided here?

Asking itself is rarely the problem. What causes trouble is a number you can't explain, or asking angrily. In research on first offers, very bold openings led to more deadlocks and more bad feeling. A figure you can back with a reason, asked politely, is the safer way.

This course gives you a simple method. Do your homework on what the work is worth. Decide your target, and the point where you'd say no. Then use short, polite sentences you've practised. Pay rules differ between countries, so where the law matters, you'll be told to check your local rules.

Here's the course. First, you'll find your market value, and set a target and a walk-away point. Then you'll learn what to say when money comes up in hiring, and how to reply to a job offer. Next, you'll negotiate the whole package, and practise simple scripts. After that, you'll ask for a raise in your current job, and handle a no. Finally, you'll get it in writing, and make your plan.

So remember: a salary offer is usually a starting point. Nerves make people expect less, so prepare early. And a polite request with a reason is the safe way to ask. Before the next lesson, write down one time you took a number without asking, and what you could have asked for instead. Next, you'll find your market value.